This has not been approved by the FDA...

Hey, I have a great idea for a new diet. You can eat whatever you want, anytime you want. You don't have to excercise, you don't have to change anything that you are doing right now. All you have to do is buy my patent pending flesh eating patch. Using the ancient secrets of the leech, you will loose 10 pounds a week! (Only for those seeking to loose ten pounds or more...)

I'm cured. Another post about commercials...

Okay, so I have another commercial for you...
Narrator: Do you have hang nails?
Show woman at party wearing gardening gloves, hiding her hands in embarrassment, turning away all the male models asking her to dance.
Narrator: Ask your doctor if Nailatronine is right for you.
Show many before and after shots of horribly hang-nailed fingers, then beautiful manicured ones (as close to the same skin tone as possible).
Narrator: Nailatronine works in a scientific way by lowing the amount of graphite in your blood and raising the amount of beautiful. People in Europe have been using this same system for years.
Show woman at party - glove free. Pulling the male models all over the dance floor, close up of beautiful hand with wedding ring as she now marries one of the models.
Narrator: (as we view the wedding) Side effects include nausea, vomiting, dry mouth, fatigue, stroke and heart attack, which in rare cases were fatal.

What we never thought we'd say part2

1. Honey, are you sitting on the beaver?
2. I don't like dinosaur tails in my head.
3. Because Mommies can't have poopy diapers.
More to come...

Huey the Human

It seems to me, besides a select few, that all animal characters in children's stories and TV shows were all named on the same criteria. Sammy the Snake, Octo the Octopus, Iggy the Igauna. I'm sure glad that the same rules don't apply to people. Then we'd all be named Huey the Human, or Polly the Person.